So the Swine Flu has been bumped up by the World Health Organization to a level four and the cases in the US have gone from 10 to 50. Our quarantine is going to last awhile. So let’s explore what really has been bugging us all lately. The Man.

The man who gets it all, keeps it all, wants it for free, whines too much has no real identity beyond his job and no real emotional investment in anyone other than himself. You know this guy.

I had a bad altercation on a train recently after having survived a modern music concert

and enjoyed a drink after the show. I had missed my train and had to take the 1:30 am home which can be quite unpleasant. Not dangerous, just drunk. I was seated next to a gaggle of unbearable human beings. An older white man in a suit, a few younger very aggressive more casually dressed, they were joined later by more men in suits. Passing beers around and stories of prostitutes, cocaine and loud testaments to what their carnal plans were for women they saw on the street and didn’t speak to.
I cracked and went after them. It was not pretty. There are reasons why someone like me takes on these creatures, knowing I’m outnumbered and that they are ultimately more powerful. I’m sick of it. I’m sick of working for these people, I’m sick of putting up with them, I’m sick of them on bubble tv and I’m sick of people telling them they are fun or funny or interesting because they are sad and pathetic and shells of human beings. Luckily for me (and because I know exactly how to handle these people: Shock, humiliate, ignore and discard) I convinced the conductor the dispose of these dregs of society. They should also know, that NO ONE LIKES THEM RIGHT NOW! Now is not the time to swagger and brag about money, status and prowess. Now is not the time to wag your entitlement around. Try watching these fine films which Warner Brothers called “Americanism Stories” The Match King (1932), Skyscaper Souls (1932) and States Attorney (1932). Really, really indulgent greed movies. These films make Gordon Geckko look like an amateur. Maybe by watching these films they may learn to get a little humility and think of others before they drop that prostitute off of the balcony.

So I wake up this morning and am bombarded with sneezing pigs. Vomiting pigs from Mexico. Swine flu has arrived in all of its ad revenue generating programing. Nothing can give us a boost in ad revenue like a good old fashioned health scare.

Remember all that duct tape and plastic wrap you bought during the bio chemical scare back in 2001?

While you are holed up in quarantine, hiding from your infectious children let me suggest a few good pre-code films which may help you get through this time without breaking down and buying some crazy antibiotic pinata at Home Depot.

The Rains Came (1937) OK, a few years off, but pretty interesting. You can tell this is a post code movie because Myrna Loy falls in love with an Indian doctor and then dies. But, she is very aggressive towards her love interest and is quite the woman of the world. Just to be clear..I’m not saying that Indian people are comparable to Mexican culture, but it deals with people traveling outside of their borders and their experience with another culture and infectious disease. I enjoyed it very much because it has this very powerful Indian woman, I think she’s the equivalent of a queen who smokes and talks like Obama. Pretty cool.

If you are feeling a little ambitious you could watch the 1914 film. Tess of the Storm Country stars Mary Pickford and Harold Lockwood who died in 1918 at the age of 33 of Spanish Influenza.

We can pay tribute to those who were lost to something that we can quite easily combat now with modern medicine.

1918 was the year of the Great Spanish Flu outbreak. This had a very large influence on film. Many stars were affected by or had survived the outbreak. Vera Kholodnaya, of whom I know nothing about but now I am interested, died of the Spanish Flu (or the Bolsheviks) had here career cut short in 1919 at the age of 26. Be Silent, Sorrow, Be Silent, a 1918 film about a circus performer who is married to a drunk acrobat and gets a sugar daddy, Mirages; Children of the Century and Zhizn za zhizn / A Life for a Life.

While you are in hiding, let me know what you find out about these films.

Influeza 1918 (this is an American Experience film, but looks like this may put things in perspective.)